The Transitions

It’s a long wait till I board my connecting flight to Boston. So I sit in the dome-shaped departure lounge of Terminal 2E at the Charles de Gaulle airport watching the metal birds take off and land. The morning sun’s rays pass through the glass walls as if to welcome me to Paris. Then I turn around to follow news on the TV screen. It’s the weather report. And only Bangalore, my home city, represents India on the map.

I’m close to 8000km away from home already. In some hours from now the distance will be around 13000km. I know that I cannot go home till my first term at the university ends. I’m not sad. I’m not excited. It’s a strange feeling I can’t explain. I chose to pursue my studies at a place far away from home. No one told me to do so. I’m not complaining. But it’s an uneasy feeling.

This is not the first time I’m feeling like this. I lived away from home for half a year while on my first job. But it was Mysore, a city just 150km away from Bangalore. I vividly remember the day my mother, father and brother were to drop me off at the company campus. I had felt blank through the journey from home to Mysore.

After a light meal at the campus food court, it was time for my parents and brother to return home. This was the hardest part – saying good-byes holding back tears with a lot of force. I had stood there with a choking throat, watching them walk out of the gate.

Whenever I had time I would simply catch a bus or train to go home. I always feel that journey toward home is somehow always shorter than the opposite way. Even before I felt contented at home, time would be up for me to leave for Mysore. I used to feel nauseous till the bus went past the city outskirts.


When I was at home during college, Mom used to complain "you can forever watch that bald guy blow up things (referring to Jeff Lieberman, presenter of Time Warp on Discovery channel) but can't talk to me". I'd call her on phone from Mysore and talk to her endlessly. If I ran out of topics, I’d even ask what the pesky neighborhood lady, who I never bothered about before, did this time.

After finishing our training at Mysore we were to leave for home. Some of my friends were leaving earlier than I. Since they were going to Bangalore and I too had to leave in a few hours’ time I had not planned to see them off at the gate. But had to go since a friend had a problem. I did not know till then that I’d get so emotional. Tears welled up in my eyes. (Guess that’s why they have labs to test practically to see if what you assume is really true)

Anyway, if you know of any word that describes the 'strange feeling' best, please let me know.


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I was sitting at the wrong gate of the terminal all the while! But had enough time to take a train to get to the right one :)

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Current Song:
It must have been love by Roxette